Our biggest road block to happiness isn’t failure, imperfection, or loneliness.
It isn’t the way we look, where we come from, how much we weigh, the amount of money we have, or the number of mistakes we’ve made.
It’s self-rejection and it’s self-doubt.
And it starts when we believe the lie that we have no worth.
We create unhappiness for ourselves when allow our negative beliefs about who we are to limit our friendships, fun, and opportunities.
Instead of going into situations with an open mind, we go into them predicting the worst.
We don’t see things as they really are—we see what we’re looking for.
And more often than not, what we’re expecting is confirmation that we aren’t good enough.
When someone criticizes us, we use it as proof that we’re inadequate.
When someone rejects us, we tell ourselves that we deserve to be alone and forgotten.
When someone abandons us, we use it as evidence that we were never wanted to begin with and shouldn’t get our hopes up in the future.
When we make a mistake, we use it as confirmation that we’re a failure and shouldn’t try again because clearly we’re incapable and wouldn’t be able to get it right anyway.
The situations and ways in which we beat ourselves up in them are endless.
Stopping the negative thoughts isn’t easy, but it is possible.
It starts when you can redefine the words you use to discount your value.
This means choosing to see failure as an opportunity for growth instead of evidence that you’re inadequate.
It means recognizing that making mistakes doesn’t make you a failure—it makes you human.
It means acknowledging that you can’t please everyone, and that just because someone doesn’t approve of who you are doesn’t mean their opinion has to become your truth or discount your worth.
It means letting go of the people who don’t accept you, and holding onto the people who love you without conditions.
It takes trusting that just because you don’t like yourself, doesn’t mean other people aren’t going to like you.
It means you stop giving up before you’ve even given yourself a chance.
It takes believing in yourself, no matter how difficult things seem.
And it takes knowing that as a living, breathing, human being, you have infinite worth.
Happiness is your birthright.
You exist, and therefore you matter.
Your value isn’t up for discussion.
It isn’t negotiable.
It just is.
And until you can accept and believe that, you will be stuck behind your own road block to happiness forever.